You know its awkward when it feels awkward.. But you still have to do it because you know that
1. its imminent;
2. its something that encourages another;
3. its something that has been on your mind for a long time;
4. God really wants you to do it;
5. You really want to do it;
6. You believe that it will help you yourself.


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Adrian is a happy man again today:) Adrian's glad that he chose this form of communication.. Adrian hopes that from now on everyone who chances on this blog gets to say hi first before leaving.. Adrian is thankful for this verse that he's trying to memorise by heart..

"For the sinful nature has always been hostile to God. It never did obeyed God's laws before, and it never will. Thats why those who are under the control of the sinful nature will never be able to please God.
You are not controlled by your sinful nature. You are controlled by the Spirit if you have the Spirit of God in you. And Christ lives in you, so that even though your body will die because of sin, the Spirit gives you life because you have been made right with God. The Spirit of God, who raised Jesus from the dead, lives within you. And just as God raised Jesus from the dead, He will also give life to your mortal bodies through the same Spirit.
Therefore, brothers and sisters, you have no obligation to do whatever your sinful nature urges you to do. If you live by its dictates, you will die. If through the power of the Spirit you put to death the deeds of your sinful nature, you will live. For all who are led by the Spirit of God are the children of God." -Romans 8:7-14

This is to Xuans,
"But the Holy Spirit produces these kinds of fruits in our lives: love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control. There are no laws against these things.
Those who belong to Christ have nailed the passions and desires of their sinful nature to His cross, crucifying them there. Since we are living by the Spirit, let us follow the Spirit's leading in all that we do. Let us not be conceit, let us not provoke one another, let us not be jealous of one another." -Galatians 5:22-24

These are to Wei Kian,
"I am the vine, you are the branches. If a man remains in Me, and I in him, he will bear much fruit, apart from Me, you can do nothing." -John 15:5

"But if you remain in my teachings, you are really my disciples. Then you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free." -John 8:31-32

"If you remain in Me, and my words remain in you, ask whatever you wish and it will be given you. This is to my Father's glory, that you bear much fruit, showing yourselves to be my disciples." -John 15:7-8

"As I have loved you, so you must love one another. By this all man will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another." -John 13:15

(Forgot the rest.. Wahaha..)

Adrian wishes all who are having exams soon to take care and rest well.. Adrian hopes to get 4.11 for gpa, so Adrian wishes that everyone who can help in one way or another to really really help him.. Adrian says a BIG THANK YOU to all, and a WARM FUZZY hug to all who are out there feeling cold.. Adrian will try his best to taichi his strength to you, which he has gotten from his Father.. Adrian says good night:)


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Adrian is a happy man today.. Adrian has done something that he has always been wanting to do for a long long time.. Adrian thanks God for what He has done today, giving Adrian the courage to do what he did not dare to do... Adrian shall now sleep a happy man:) Adrian hopes that ice has melted a bit, that old bonds are reforged, that silence is now removed:) Adrian is a happy man:) Adrian smiles:)

But Adrian still has one concern.. Adrian is still worried about a small girl, and hopes that the small girl will contact him soon.. Adrian hopes that everything is going on fine in that small little body of the little girl.. Adrian prays for good health and strength.. Adrian smiles:)

Adrian hopes that that small boy also is still working hard.. Adrian hopes that the small boy will keep asking him questions.. Adrian wishes that the small boy is strong:) Adrian smiles:)


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Finally its e end for both Marketing and Effective Comm.. Erm.. Marketing still has exam la.. But both Presentations are finally over!!! Yay!! Feel like giving myself a break, but still the exams are getting oh-so-close.. Can even smell it from here... N i'm lagging behind already.. Man.. Hai...

Romans 1:9... Telling mi to be courageous and go ahead.. I dun wanna live my life thinking back on how I do not like this feeling.. It seems that i've taken a wrong turn somewhere in the past few months of my life.. I'm doing a 3 point turn now.. *Wonders if you still see this not..* I'm coming home~ I'll wanna work hard.. Help mi k? Lil miss beamy girl.. All I want is our friendship to be as before..

Am kinda worried bout lil miss Jam.. But, I'm not a person who'll usually call.. Should I? Its like even orange too.. Oso kinda worried for him, but still cant overcome this thing with calling.. If u're ok, please tell mi K? Somehow, someway.. I dont care... I wanna know...


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The Matrix stresses on belief.. Slumdog Millionaire stresses the importance of experiences.. Dont you think this sounds kinda familiar??

Powered By God's Work
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And just as Jesus opens the door to His house for His friends, so will I open the door of Life to my friends, leading them into a life of pure joy and happiness..

Today was auditions for Hark Performing Team.. Case u dunno, Hark's a music sch i'm attending for vocal lessons.. Had to skip service for this, but still managed to rush down to church in time for icebreakers.. Overall, audition was kinda good:) We were suppose to sing only a chorus of our song, but when i finished my chorus, the judge actually asked for my tcher's name n even asked mi to continue to sing a verse.. Quite happy after that.. Also when i left right after my turn, another tcher whom i walked pass was saying that it was v good:) Hopefully she's not trying to do some psychological help thingy..

You see, I've this problem.. Since young, I've always had low self esteem.. I tend to think that even people close to mi will not be interested in how i feel, in what i do.. I amplify my failures, esp those that'll affect mi socially.. I try my best to thread on thick ice, but when i do fall, i fall hard..

This is why I sometimes only let people noe of things on a need to know basis.. Saves myself from all e trouble if i accidentally hit something somewhere wrong.. Hmm.. Am trying to work on it now tho, so do feel free to encourage mi from time to time:) Thanx:) But still, I would like to help people, esp people whom I've a ominous feeling bout.. Think the experiences i've had is God training mi to be more sensitive to people's thoughts n feelings ba..


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Is technology a gift, or a slow ticking time-bomb?? *wonders*

Tech lets you write stuffs you dun usually talk about, brings the world closer together than you ever realise (look at Facebook), allows one to befriend other "ones" easily.. Tech opens up a wide resource of knowledge, speeds up research, make what was once impossible possible, cures diseases, etc...

BUT tech also masks intentions and feelings, secludes oneself from the world (XBox360, PS3), makes one dwell in his own VR, indirectly causes insensitivity and violence, gives youngsters a quick shortcut into the "adult" world, create killing machines, are the main cause of mass destruction, causes environmental degradation (mass killing too..), etc...

My tutor told us yday that we're now in the silicon age, juz like how in the past we've bronze age and stone age.. But guess wat?? This silicon age is ending soon.. Researchers predicted that it will end by the year 2020.. And many are now searching for something better to help mankind keep growing.. As what people say, change is the only constant in life.. Its hard to disagree right??

But does it mean that the world is going to end soon?? I think so.. Imagine if some geeky scientist actually discovers something greater and produces GUNDAMs.. In real life mind you.. Its gonna be the end!! End Times man!! Better be careful, for you dunno wats coming up... We're gonna be slaves of technology!!! AHHHH!!!!


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"But if you hold to my teachings, you are really my disciples. Then you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free." -John 8:31-32

"A new command I give you: Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another. By this all man will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another." -John 13:34-35

"I am the vine, you are the branches. If a man remains in me and I in him, he will bear much fruit, apart from me, you can do nothing."-John 15:5

"If you remain in me and my word remains in you, ask whatever you wish, and it will be given you. This is to My father's glory, that you produce much fruit, showing yourselves to be My disciples." -John 15:7-8

"Greater love has no one than this, that He gave his life for His friends." -John 15:13

"You did not choose Me, but I have chosen you and appointed you to go and bear fruit, fruit that will last. Then the Father will give you whatever you ask in my name." -John 15:16

"And Jesus said to them: All authority in heaven and on earth has been given to Me. Therefore, go and make disciples of all nations, baptising them in the name of the Father, the Son and the Holy Spirit. Teach these new disciples the commands I have given you. And be sure of this: I am with you always, even to the end of the age." -Matthew 28:18-20

"Since we each have one body with many members, and each member do not all have the same function, so do we in Christ form one body, with every member belonging to one another." -Matthew 12:4-5

"And Jesus turned to the crowd and said: Those who want to be my followers must first turn from their selfish desires, take up their cross daily and follow Me." -Luke 9:23

""For I know the plans I have for you", says the Lord. "Plans of good, not of disaster, to give you a future, and a hope. In those days, when you pray, I will be listening. If you look for Me wholeheartedly, you will find Me."" -Jeremiah 29:11-12

"But you are a chosen people, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, a people belonging to God, that you may declare your praises unto Him who has called you out from the darkness, and into His wonderful light." -1 Peter 2:9

"But God did not give you a spirit of fear and humility, but of power, love, and self-discipline." - 2 Timothy 1:7

"You are not controlled by your sinful desires. You are controlled by the Spirit, if you have the Spirit of God living within you. And Christ lives within you, so even though your body will die because of sin, the Spirit gives you life because you have been made right with God. The Spirit of God, who raised Jesus from the dead, lives within you. And just as God raised Jesus from the dead, He will give life to your mortal bodies through the Spirit living within you.
Therefore, brothers and sisters, you have no obligation to do what your sinful nature urges you to do. If you live by its dictates, you will die. If through the power of the Spirit you put to death the deeds of your sinful nature, you will live. For all who are led by the Spirit are the children of God." -Romans 8:9-14

"But the Holy Spirit produces these kinds of fruits in our lives: love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control. There is no law against such things.
Those who belong to Christ Jesus have nailed the passions and desires of their sinful nature to His cross, and crucified them there. Since we are living by the Spirit, let us follow the Spirit's leading in all that we do. Let us not be conceit, or provoke one another, or be jealous of one another." -Galatians 5:22-26

Another one more..

"God disciplines us for our good, taht we may share in his holiness. No discipline seems pleasant at the time, but painful. Later on, however, it produces a harvest of righteousness and peace for those who have been trained by it.
Therefore, strengthen your feeble armsand weak knees. "Make level pathsfor your feet," so that the lame may not be disables, but rather healed." -Hebrews 12:10-13


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Do not think of Mondays as a day of blues and the start of a tiresome week.. I think of Mondays as a new week which i can look forward to, as it brings me to new levels.. Monday's the start of a training to look forward with high expectations for the week, knowing that I can learn so much more with the help of the one true Spirit in me..

Its always great to hear bout things going on in peoples' lives.. Lam and I were suddenly talking bout church over lunch tday, and we got e chance to share to e only non-christian within our grp.. U noe wat he said?? He'll only believe in God when he actually gets to encounter Him himself.. Aint that great?? God can make use of every opportunity for His Kingdom to touch the hearts of people..

Glad that Xuan's finally cleared of all her illnesses after ER.. She said when she was helping others break their strongholds, God also healed her at the same time.. N now who can say that He aint real?? If you realli think God's not real, can you care to explain the many times when we were praying for something n we do actually get it?? N when I say get it, it doesn't mean I purposely go and get it, but is that it just comes just from praying!!

I finally got to realli comprehend the understanding of being thankful for the smallest things in life.. Juz having a meal with my mum, mei, n john already made mi kinda happy.. I realise that i'm also slowly learning to openly speak about God to people.. God's training me.. Thank you God:)

I dont care what the world says behind me.. I dont care what people think about me.. I dont care what do people know about me.. I dont care what I feel about myself.. No more Me, myself, and I.. I wish everyday to be like that... Pray hard..


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God - Singing = God
Singing - God = Singing
God + Singing = Godly Singing

Sometimes i feel like the first statement, sometimes i feel like the second.. I guess, I've still yet to experience the third daily.. HOW? How can I learn this??

Its like
Infinity - 0 = Infinity
0 - Infinity = -Infinity

More of You, less of me.. More of helping, serving, rara-ing, enjoying company, doing the right thing.. Less of senseless thoughts, headaches, unsteady emotions..

I'm actually worrying bout my studies now.. But its still mentally, not physically.. Some people say that I do think too much.. Even going into details on eating at Ya Kun's.. I do agree with that.. That I should not be bothering too much on details.. Kinda remembered that I've only ate a wafer n some egg crisp rolls before bs... So now stomach bit grumbling...

There's also some people who tell mi that I'm sensitive, but may be bit oversensitive at times.. I feel that its good to be sensitive.. As in, no matter how uncomfortable i'll be, I'll try to speak english to you when we've a malay fren of urs with us.. notice if someone's day has not been v good.. Oversensitive as in, people's line of sight just bounces off mi, how i tend to want to not join you and your frens for lunch, how do people noe my name when I dun even noe them..

I can be sensitive to people, but insensitive to God.. Hai... Why like that??? Help Help!!!


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Its great to wake up to the sound of the super enthu deejays on 933 saying "Its Friday!!~".. Always makes me realise that the week's almost over!! Always looking forward to saturdays, but at the thought of 4 weeks to exam, it kinda pulls mi back to reality... Hai...

Was kinda happy with this week, mainly cos of a few things.. Fellowship was realli done thruout the week.. Mon called orange and chatted wid him, tues was kinda low.. But alot of ppl were encouraging mi on Wed after reading!! Spent time wid small lil Jam on Wed, thurs was watching movie wid orange n fried rice, thurs also had a short chat wid Zhi Wen, Fri got to meet Wei Jian for discipleship.. See.. A well planned out week.. Sometimes, its your small delibrate acts that help lift up your spirits, but also sometimes, its also others' unwillingness that brings yuor morale down to way low...

I find it kinda hard to maintain friendships when there's little room to communicate, but well, God draws people closer.. If its meant to be like this, it'll be:) Dun worry people n frens i dun realli see every week.. I still rmb you:) Am wanting to see ya all again, but its gotta hold till after exams.. Real sorry.. Meanwhile, rmb to miss mi everywhere you go! Haha.. (Is this why I always sneeze?? Hmm... Probably I guess..)

Didnt noe wat to title this post.. Lol.. I like blubber:)


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To say some things about me..

I like to eat pi pa gao..

I love sashimi.. But too little chance to eat nowadays..

I've always had a low self esteem.. Discovered this when I was in Pri 5/6..

I am a social person.. I crave people's company..

I am nothing without God..

I wanna watch Slumdog Millionaire..

After doing QT in school, I've this feeling that I'm slowly becoming a loner..

Every tuesday, I will get to sing the super emo song posted earlier...

I am really SHY.. If our eyes dun meet n u're still a stranger to me, even though we see each other every week, I will not make it a point to talk to you..

I think alot.. too much at some points of time..

I am a relationship person.. I always want to get into a relationship.. But sometimes I do things wrongly..

I might be closing this blog soon..

I love family dinners..

I am sensitive, but ignorant in different situations..

I want to close this door and never open it ever again..

I can still remember the kids from 5I/J.. Now 6I/J i think... Melvin, Yes I do remember you, small boy...

I wish I could slap myself for doing stupid things sometimes...

I want to run away.. But God's pushing me forward still..

I want to be stronger, so I can stop thinking of things this way... I'm praying for this everyday.

If God wasnt in my life, I would realli be in a great depression almost everyday..

I am alive with God's grace..


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Grr.. Some stupid error has made mi post this twice.. Grr..

Anyway, Juz wanted to share wid u all e song I'm singing for my stage 2 vocal training, mainly focusing on expressing feelings.. This is not one of e reasons as to why i will occassionally emo suddenly, I assure you:)

让每个人都心碎 黄大炜

城市一片漆黑
谁都不能看见谁
除非紧紧的依偎

我让自己喝醉
没有你我就不能入睡
整夜又整夜地徘徊

我说过我绝对不会后悔
寂寞是被原谅的罪 喔
爱情怎么让每个人都心碎
怎么去安慰
爱情怎么让每个人都流泪 喔

城市一片漆黑
谁都不能看见谁
除非紧紧的依偎
我让自己喝醉
没有你我就不能入睡
整夜又整夜的徘徊

我说过我绝对不会后悔
寂寞是被原谅的罪 喔
爱情怎么让每个人都心碎
怎么去安慰
爱情怎么让每个人都流泪
你的泪烫伤我的脸
那一次我尝到伤悲
~~~
music

我说过我绝对不会后悔
寂寞是被原谅的罪 喔
爱情怎么让每个人都心碎
怎么去安慰
爱情怎么让每个人都流泪
你的泪烫伤我的脸
从此就再也说不出
我爱谁~~~

Emo rite?? Well, thats juz how it is ba.. N my tcher say I've a problem expressing myself in this song.. Hmm.. Btw, she sang this exact same song for 5 years worth of competitions i think.. N still got champ.. Lol.. This is how good she is:)
But will still work hard in my feelings part ba:) I always feel like i'm acting when I sing.. Haha.. Muz get into the role de.. My tcher keep scolding mi for not doing it.. Hmm..


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Amazingly, I realise that people do check my blog way early in e mornin!! 6am even!! Wow.. Good morning!!! Wake up sunshine!! Have a good start of the day!! (Am starting to wonder if is someone playing a trick on mi... Hmm...) Not even I myself will do this man.. Lol..

But thanx anyway peeps:) Thanx for ur care n concern, even though I had a feeling that no one would ever come on this blog anymore other than a few peeps.. Thanx all :) (90degrees bow)


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To those who replied, thanx.. Lets mi noe that at least u still noe of mi.. To those who didnt, I juz hoped you received it.. If you changed ur phone no n didnt inform mi, I'll grab ur head under my arms n drill ur skull wid my knuckles.. But I guess I wouldn't have known anyway.. Lol.

Am having problems with e song for music school.. Cant seem to get e prog working.. Hai.. I need help..

Yday was feeling a bit ti-xin-diao-dan bout this morn's quiz.. Thank God for making it easy.. Haha.. Thank God He gave mi brains to digest the formulas.. Ernz was describing mi as a sotong doing quiz.. Haha.. At least the sotong had to provide help to "some people" in her english.. Lol.. Who's the real blur sotong here? Haha.. *bleah*

Few days ago decided to do a small testing somewhere.. Am glad at the results.. Wahaha.. At least there's still some who cares:) Thanx all!! :).

Oh, n one more thing to add, please do take care of urselves peeps:) drink more water n eat more fruits:) Rainy season again i think.. Wrap urselves up in a blanket when u slp if needed.. The economy's failing, so is the environment.. Lets not make life any worse k? Take care of urself on e road too:)

Am thankful for seeing 2 prayers answered too:) Hope to see ya ard soon! Nitez!


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Hmm.. The blog's slowly bleeding to death... Haha.. Well, a good thing n maybe a bad thing ba.. Hmm... At least now can post more personal stuffs ba.. Hmm.. At least is hopefully you dun get to read this if i'm blasting off my heads at you la.. Haha.. Well.. Dun realli do that too do i? Hmm.. But somehow get this feeling that slowly close frens are moving further away from mi.. Am being more oblivious to people's lives.. Give mi back my friends!!!! Life, please slow down a bit as we get to enjoy the fellowship we have..

Everyone quite get a small cup of tea n sit in front of ur com as you see this... Slow down n sip this cup of tea as you enjoy time spent in relaxation, basking under the light:) You know you need this..


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